Bondage toys: how to use

BDSM is a compound word, which stands for Bondage and Discipline (B&D), Dominance and Submission (D&S), Sadism and Masochism(S&M).It includes such activities as restraining, spanking, whipping, role-playing, experimenting with body sensations, using various senses deprivation (like blindfolders) and many others. Bondage toys adds great sensual thrill to sexual play. But for many people the first question that comes to their mind is how to introduce bondage toy to your partner. You may feel awkward and uncomfortable about the idea to introduce things, a mainstream society considers as a perversion. These general rules may be useful for those who want to share desires with their partner:

Introducing bondage toys

- You may start talking about introducing bondage, by uttering your wishes in a "soft" manner, trying not to push the topic roughly. You may begin with emphasizing your preferences, like "I would love to ..", " It feels great if you would..."
- You may share your opinions on books, programs or films on related topics and suggest things which turned you on.
- Talk out every misunderstanding; this will make your sexual relationships stronger and more intimate.

Safe words

Before anyone gets involved in bondage play BDSM community set "Safe, Sane and Consensual"(SSC) motto, which means that bondage activities should wear no risk to health, should take place in sane and sound cast of mind and all parties fully agree on activities they are going to proceed. This should refer to you if you decided to try bondage. First of all you should trust the person to let him tie you up or flog yourself. Use "safe words" to mark the limits of the play. These can be common “color” word codes (red for "stop" and yellow for "slow down").

Restraining safety

If you decided to tie your submissive so that he can feel the high of being pleased in immovable state, you should be sure restraints are safe for your partner's health. The hardness of the bondage restraint will influence the way you are going to tie your partner.

You may choose a wide range of leather cuffs, metal handcuffs, ropes and scarves.
- Use "finger test" for restraining: you should be able to slip a finger or two between the cuff and the wrist or ankle.
- Neck and joints (elbows, knees and etc) should be avoided for restraints and should never be too tight if used.
- The harder is the material of restraint, the less tightness it should execute.
- You should make use of regular checking your passive's state. Any doubtful signs, such as coldness or whitening of the limbs are a cause to stop the play.
- Apply tension on a wide body area.
- Be sure you have emergency tools for cutting and unfastening.

Flagellation Safety

Flagellation or flogging is one of the strongest and tempting activities, which include hitting with floggers, whips, paddles, crops and other devices meant for bondage discipline. Flogging doesn't need to be painful by all means. Some may use only symbolic flagellation with soft materials floggers, which give more like a massaging stimulation, than pain sensation. The intensity of the whipping depends on your or your partner's individual preferences and resistance. And you should always take precautions against severe harm.

- Using protection on most sensitive areas is a good choice to prevent your submissive from careless hit. You can put on some garments, like leather jackets, collars and your own clothing, which can serve you for safety.
- Flogging is usually better performed on particular parts of the body, which are more fleshy and fat. These include such parts as butt and thighs, upper back and upper chest for men. Buttocks are the most suitable part and you may apply stronger hits on this area.
- Avoid following parts: chest, abdomen, joints, neck, lower abdomen and the spine area.
- Watch out carefully for such signs as reddening of the skin, bruisers and cuts, and stop when needed.

General rule

Keep in mind SSC slogan. Be sure, competent and resolute about bondage play.